All I want for Christmas

‘Tis the season for giving, and I am on board. I love the whole process of the Christmas Season. The trimmings, tradition, family gatherings, and my once a year splurge on ‘8 Trick Butter Cookies’ with Butter Cream frosting. I can almost smell ‘em now. Drifts of powered sugar in the air and enough butter to pack a grueling Holiday five on my backside to be run off later. Worth it!

There is something so magical about this time of year. Even with the chaotic bustle of last minute shopping (guilty!) and the late night wrapping and stowing of Santa’s deliveries, there is something so peaceful, beautiful…holy, about Christmas. We know the story. Christ the Savior was born of the Virgin Mary, birthed in a manger, wrapped in swaddling clothes. Magical. And by the way, go Mary! Au natural. Not for me, but the woman’s a rock star.

I say all this to communicate--in an overly verbose and whimsical way--that I love Christmas! I love the frivolity, the giving, and above all--Jesus. What’s not to love?

But the past few years have brought on some challenges. Sounds daunting, considering what is about I am about to say is so trivial. Here is my big confession. And for my family, I know this is continuing to create problems. Forgive me.

I don’t know what I want for Christmas.

I remember a time, in the not so distant past, where I knew what I wanted. Okay, I might not have had an itemized and tidy little list equipped with prices and stars ranking order of importance like my brother, but I could at least call upon several things to wish for. And subsequently, pass along that tidbit to whoever wanted to know.

But something happened. And I can’t quite pinpoint the problem but maybe it has something to do with a tragically neglected shopping habit. Care free days of impulsive purchases on shoes, purses, clothes, (Oh, my!) where have you gone? Apparently out the window when along came two babies, a mortgage, and student loans. Okay, so not in that order, but you get the idea.

And then the task of shopping was accompanied by a whole new set of senses. Instead of the bright soft fabrics calling from the racks and the sweet smell of imported leather tempting my wallet to fork it over, I hear the shriek of that soft cashmere as my 8 month old spits up over my shoulder, nearly splattering the ‘dry clean only’ money pit. Oh, and that sweet smell, overrun by the filling of one or both boys drawers the instant we find the least convenient place to change a diaper. My appologies fellow shoppers.

I think my former, retail-lovin’ self got lost along the way to becoming the oldest 26 year old on the planet. Why? Does it have to be one or the other? I miss those days. And that girl had some great clothes!

Now, I love my children more than I ever loved shopping. More than I ever loved clothes. More than I could ever put to verse, or song, or sonnet, so I am not complaining about the joy and challenge they bring to my life every day. But Mama needs a Christmas List.

And apparently, Mama needs help! What is on your list this year? What is your must have of the season? And what is your favorite thing about Christmas?

Sending blessing for a very Merry Christmas your way!