Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Dream On-Part One


How far would you go to protect your dream?

No, not reach your dream, protect it. Perhaps I should clarify by spilling my guts. A good soul deep purge can be quite cathartic and I fear it is high time I seek some counsel on my big, festering secret.

I am a writer.

Okay, so if you are indeed reading this blog you already know that. The secret is, other than you few, no one else knows this about me. Fellow writers from ACFW this is why I appear so unpopular and lame online. And those handful of my closest friends and relatives who have been entrusted with my closet writing, I know I am weird, but thank you for your continued discretion, and ban from befriending me on Facebook.

Whew! Man, that feels good to get off my chest. But I suppose that was just the warm up for the day I will really need to confess. Why would I hide this, you may ask? Perhaps I am not serious about it? Dabbling?

Let me just say that that is NOT it. Not at all. I am, in fact, one of those crazy go getters. Where my dreams are concerned I am driven to succeed. Nothing short of God’s hand can sway my course once I set my mind to something.

Though I may be misguided in my attempts to do so, I honestly feel like I am protecting my dream. But protecting it from what?

I’ll get to that in part two, but for now, I have a question.

Have you ever hidden a dream? What were your reasons? And as a writer, did you have to come out at some point? What was the deciding factor for your decision?

Stay tuned for part two of Dream On, for the nail-biting conclusion and a chance to school me severely. I fear I am gonna need it.

13 comments:

  1. Amy--
    I didn't tell anyone about my writing for ages and ages. Only my immediate family knew, and I'm sure some friends wondered why I was always so "busy". I didn't tell people because I knew that the majority of them wouldn't understand, and I had a fear of failure. I was afraid that people would look at me with that "bless her heart" look folks have when someone says they're going to be a singer or an actress. So I just kept it to myself. But I felt the urge (one I think was Divine) to tell a high school chum of mine who shared my love of books. At the time we weren't particularly close, just buddies who mostly crossed paths on Facebook. When I told her, she was excited for me. I told her that know one else knew and her response has stuck with me. She said, "Either you're a writer or you aren't." I decided I was, and that meant going all in--no matter the consequences. And I've never been one to be shy or secretive about anything, so I couldn't continue to be insecure. It's not in my nature. It's only been since making that choice to be "public" about my passion that I've become a part of this amazing writing community. There are so many blessings. And who cares what everyone else thinks?
    Be proud of your passion! :)
    And as for the friend who gave me such important advice, she's now a critique partner and on her own path to completing her first novel. And we get to share this fantastic journey together.

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    1. Jenny,
      Thank you so much for sharing your story. I had decided that when I got an agent that that would be confirmation enough to launch my dream into the weighty world of other's opinions and expections. But as I will pose in part two, by doing this am I protecting my dream, or hindering it? I am not ashamed. And I trust God implicitly with the new dream he has given me. Maybe I'm just still so young in this endeaver that I want to baby it as long as I can. Though my excuses are feeling weaker each time they slip from my lips. Perhaps it is time to be loud and proud. Thanks for the encouragement and support!

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    2. And by the way, I just re-read my comment and realized I said "know one" instead of "no one." *shudder* *cringe* I really should proof-read. Sorry about that. :) lol. Thank God for editors, right???

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    3. You are hilarious! :) my comments are always riddled with typos. Especially when I use my phone and auto correct replaces my words. No doubt, people have likely questiones my mental faculties from time to time.

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  2. Shout it from the mountains Amy!! Cause you're a writer and a darn good one!
    I had/have the same "bless her heart" fear as Jenny. Telling someone new my dreams can bring on mixed reactions. Thankfully the handful of non-writer friends that I see every day are bubbling with support for me. And that feels good!
    Are you leading up to a big reveal??? I'm so emailing you right now! :)

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    1. Lacie,
      I am always so blessed by your heart for encouraging. I realize that I am in this writing thing pretty deep to still be holding such a secret. It would seem the general concensus is that I am a big chicken. :)

      Now, I was unsure from your post. Are still cloistering your dream too, or have you proclaimed loud and proud that you write amazing and charming historical romance?

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  3. Amy,
    I can't wait until you tell people that you are writing. I for one love your work. I look forward to reading your pages. They make me laugh, cry, and sit on the edge of my chair! Sometimes I can't sleep if I read them right before going to bed.
    I know you are waiting to tell people until you have an agent, but there are so many people that would support your dream now. This is different than singing. You always held back, because success would take you places that you didn't really want to go. Writing is not like that. I look forward to seeing all that God has in store for you.

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    1. You are one of few that have gotten eyes on my writing. And I have to say, your enthusiasm and endless bounty of encouragement have really given my dream wings. Thank you for being a source of strenth and support. Someday, you name will grace the acknowledgements page of my first published novel. ;)

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    2. That's exciting! I can't wait:)

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  4. I told people I was a writer for years -- and I wasn't writing a thing. I was a writer who wasn't writing. In my heart, I knew I was a writer. But I was so busy with life ... kids ... my husband's demanding schedule ... other commitments that I chose ...
    and yet, I knew I was a writer.
    It's funny. Some of those people look at me now and say, "Look, you're finally a writer."
    And I think, "No. I was a writer all along. I'm just doing it out loud and in public now."
    You're a writer whether you tell people or not, Amy.
    :)

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  5. I like your style, Beth! And I admire your chutzpah. That's the stuff that makes a great heroine. :)

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  6. Yup, I was even more in the closet, didn't blog or do social media, just on some writing loops. My hubby outed me when I was away at a conference and someone at church asked me where I was. Then the pastor outed me publicly when I won the Daphne. After that, I often was asked so when's your book coming out, because non-writers don't understand how long the process is, especially if they have a friend who just self-published a book, which it seems everyone has these days. LOL (and that btw was my reason for doing it quietly. I knew it takes an average of 5- 10 years of serious pursuit before your first traditionally published book hits the shelves.

    To my surprise, I discovered that my s-i-l and m-i-l had always wanted to write romance. And that my s-i-l had actually pursued that dream for awhile, many years ago, on sly obviously. So...you never know what allies you might unexpectedly discover. :)

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    1. Oh, sandra.... Outed by your husband! My mom will probably be the one to out me. She likes to toe the line. She's quite proud of my writing, I don't think she can help herself. :) the time will come for me. Probably sooner than later.

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