Tuesday, February 7, 2012


How often are we ruled by fear?

Let me preface this by saying that the two’s are hitting us hard at the Simpson house. My sweet and loving toddler has these Bruce Banner moments where he is withdrawn one minute and belligerent the next. Lord only knows what switch was thrown to turn my baby into the Hulk but, Jesus, we need your help!

So I was at my son’s Mommy and Me soccer class yesterday. Week two. Lord, please let it go better than week one where I was the recipient of every pitying stare in the soccer dome. My almost two and a half year old, Kael, executed the most blood-curdling meltdown for the duration of the 45-minute class. Impressive, yes. Enjoyable, let’s go with ‘heck no!’ And yesterday, we were forced to drop the class after ten minutes.

After the miserable experience, and the unquestionable torture you would have sworn my son was experiencing, doubts and fear started to worm their way into my mind. My heart. You see, I stay at home with my kids. That means most days it’s just me and the boys. We have play dates and we go to parks and museums so it’s not like we are quarantined, but I got to worrying about my son’s social development. All the other kids loved the soccer class. And Kael, though he was the youngest by several months, was easily the fastest and most athletic kid out there. The kid loves sports! He could throw a strike and hit a ball off a tee before he could walk. (Thanks to my hubby who played ball in the minors) And he can actually run and weave while kicking the soccer ball. I was sure this class would be a home run for us. He could deplete those seemingly endless stores of energy before naptime and do what he loves in the process. So what is the problem? Could it be something more than the terrible two’s?

It’s hard not to let fear squeak through the cracks. What if something is wrong? What if I have ruined him? Now, I know that sounds like an overreaction, but it’s crazy where your mind goes when fear is involved.

My mom, the wise warrior that she is, witnessed my distress and took a moment to convince me I am not the worst mother to ever walk the earth. Thanks mama! But she said something that was so simple, yet so profound. And it really resonated and gave me peace.

She said, “The opposite of fear isn’t faith, it’s love.”

Now, we have all heard the verse, ‘Perfect love casts out fear’, but somehow, it always feels like fear is a faith issue. If we could just have enough faith and trust God that everything will work out, we can win against fear. The truth of the matter is there are lots of reasons to fear. The world is a scary place. Terrible things happen. But the anecdote for living in fear isn’t something that can be overcome or exorcised by your great faith.

It is the realization of Christ’s love. It’s so basic it’s almost confusing. Isaiah 41:10 says So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Like everything else it has nothing to do with who we are or what we do, but rather who Jesus is, and what He did.

What do you fear the most? And how has God helped you to overcome fear?


  1. You have a wise Mama! And frankly, I'm amazed that they even offer "organized" sports for two-year-olds. It was a long time ago, but as I recall two-year-olds are not interested in sharing, especially a ball that they want to kick around. LOL. My fears have tended to be concerning loss and I'd always coped with them by envisioning how God might intercede if I were to lose a spouse of a child. Perhaps that's why I write books that show people overcoming loss etc. Now when fearing for my kids driving in snowy weather, I'm on my knees praying!

    1. Yeah, you're right about not sharing. We might attempt the soccer class when he gets a bit older. :)

      Like you, my greatest fears revolve around my family. Their safety. My hubby has a dangerous job and often I feel like I am waiting for bad news. Terrible thing to live in fear. And so hard to be free of it even if we know the truth about God's love and grace. But I do know that God is faithful... no matter what and when I feel that love surround me in my dark times, I know that he will see me through whatever comes.

      Thanks for sharing, Sandra!

  2. That scripture is my favorite...always has been...always will be. I think so many times we see our children's behavior as a representation of our parenting. Whether that behavior is good or bad. I remember before I had Jace, watching parents with their "misbehaved" children and saying in my mind, I will never parent like that. Haha! I laugh at those thoughts now. Kids have good days and bad. I think sometimes we just expect too much out of them. Plain and simple. They are still babies. I try and remind myself when I see other people out with their families and their children seem to be so well behaved, or so much more advanced than mine, or even happier than mine, that that is just a glimpse into their life. Being a parent is hard! You're a great mom!

    1. I agree wholeheartedly. With everything. It is so hard not to cast blame on ourselves when our children misbehave. Do I coddle him too much? Am I lacking in the discipline department? Surely I am doing something wrong. They grow up so fast sometimes I forget that they are still babies. And babies act like, well, babies. :) Thanks for the reminder and the perspective. You are an amazing mama too. I always feel like I can learn something from you.

  3. I've kept this blog post open for several days because I wanted to read it, despite being buried under book #2. And today I finally snagged a few minutes.
    So much to say about fear ... and being a mommy ... and embracing love, God's love, not fear ...
    all I know is this:
    All those things I've feared over the years? Very few of them have come true. Almost none of them.
    All those promises of God -- who He says he will be?
    He's been faithful and proven himself true every single time.

    1. Thanks for the perspective, Beth. Sometimes the greatest assurance we have is to look back as see all the times God has delivered us from our fears, remember all the times we felt the safe haven of His arms. That is actually the theme of my book 2 tentatively titled In His Grip. :) That's is where we find rest from all that worry and fear.

  4. Hi Amy,

    I appreciate your blog. My only quip is with your mum's profound phrase... because I hear Jesus identify fear and faith as being on one continuum in the storm story, see Mark 4:40 (in other versions too). All else is good.